I was under a tremendous amount of stress. My partner was diagnosed with progressive cerebellum disfunction. She progressively started to lose her ability to write, and then to walk. We went through a lot with her illness -- always in and out of the hospitals, intensive care units (ICUs), and long-term acute care hospitals. She progressively became solely dependent on me for everything. She was estranged from her family. At the end, she would lay in our living room with a tracheotomy and a respirator. We had an ICU in our living room where she passed away. I took some time to grieve at a friend’s house, and within two weeks after her death, I was showering and found a lump in my right breast. I was so scared that my whole body went numb.
My worst fear was realized when my doctor confirmed that I did, in fact, have breast cancer. I went through radiation, chemotherapy and a lumpectomy and had 17 lymph nodes removed. As I reflected over what was happening, I knew I did not care for myself in the ways I needed. I recognized that I was living my life almost identically to the way my mother lived her life. I was doing with my partner, the same things my mother would do with my father. She was anxiety ridden because of my father’s alcoholism, and I was anxiety ridden because of my partner’s disease. My mother escaped into her work, and I also escaped into mine. My mother died from advanced stage breast cancer that metastasized, and I was just diagnosed with breast cancer. I knew innately that the thoughts that I was having was causing my dis-ease, although I did not know how to change.
I knew that I wanted to be well, and I would do just about anything to be well. Gilda’s club is a cancer support group for anyone going through cancer. This group is now called Cancer Support Community of North Texas. I met lots of people there; it is a beautiful community. It is a place of refuge during a confusing and lonely time. I was supported and felt nurtured at Gilda’s. I expressed and could self-reflect by telling my story to others. I hoped that I could comfort others going through what I had gone through and inspire others to realize there is hope. We are in this together. I made meaningful and lasting relationships there: some who have passed away and some that I will be friends with for the rest of my life. I realized during all of this that the connection with people is so meaningful and so nourishing and enriching.
Gilda’s club offered different things like classes, lectures, art, and yoga. I faithfully signed up for several activities including a lecture on the topic of permanent healing given by a teacher at the School of Metaphysics. The speaker talked about how our thoughts manifest in the body as either ease or dis-ease. I became aware that if I could change the way I thought about myself, my life, and others, my body would also change. I wanted to know and learn more, so I signed up for a Mastery of Consciousness class at the School of Metaphysics.
The School of Metaphysics coursework is structured to be a weekly class where I had classmates and a teacher who lovingly led us through a series of lessons, and mental and energetic exercises to aid us to go within. The first one was a self-respect exercise. This was great because I had not really been looking at myself or giving myself my own attention. The self-respect exercise taught me to look within myself so that I could see me in a new and fresh light. Through this exercise, I was able to look deep into my soul knowing that I was much more than this physical experience.
We also focused on dreams and dream interpretation. I learned that dreams are messages from our inner self and each week, we interpreted them. Our dreams can aide us to know ourselves on deeper levels and can be incredibly nourishing when you listen. Dreams are a big part of this course of study. Another profound mental exercise we practiced is a concentration exercise. This one was the clincher. I was learning exactly what was going on in my mind and how to change it. My consciousness was shifting changing for the better. I learned how to see my emotions and inform them. I was grateful to know my emotions were a guide to lead me to my core negative beliefs. For instance, anger, sadness, and frustration may lead me to a thought or belief such as “I can’t make it work.” For this reason, it was good to have a teacher who kept us on track. We would do these exercises and come back to class and talk about our experiences. This was amazing to me. The exercises are mind blowing. The daily practice supported me to slow my thoughts down to perceive what was going on in my own head so that I could change what was inhabiting my mind.
Those negative core beliefs were replaced with thoughts/beliefs like, “I can do this.” This was the key to my healing.
The practice of concentration was aimed to prepare me for deeper meditations. Before practicing concentration, my mind and body was so busy. I was learning how to slow the mind and body down so that I could be calm and relaxed to mediate. I do not believe that I could have had deep meditations if I had not prepared myself through my class studies. Meditation coupled with a separate practice of visualization encouraged my change. I was on a journey inward to explore learning who I was as a physical being, and as a spiritual being. I was changing my DNA! I learned to visualize who I wanted to become. There is a special formula for this. It is so thrilling to know we all are conscious creators; we are the captain of our ships. I had a burning desire for healing and wholeness and filled my thoughts with images to manifest that reality.
I chose to become Healing Class director to deepen my understanding of permanent healing. I relied upon elements from a book entitled, “Permanent Healing,” by Dr. Daniel Condron. This book reveals mental causes that produce physical effects in the body. I have seen many healings occur. In class, we create a healing field for distance healing every Sunday night at 7:30pm for anyone requesting service. My own healing is magnified through serving in this way.
I have also taught a 10-week class entitled “Superconscious Healing.” This short course will take you all the way back to infancy connecting the dots including your parents and how you can understand yourself on all levels to cause your own healing. I highly suggest this course. I have seen people heal mentally, emotionally, and physically though these healing modalities. I have been without cancer for over ten years and I am grateful for the opportunity that my studies have afforded me. I realize that I cannot control the future; however, I have ever growing confidence that I can continue to evolve my thoughts and beliefs to be in alignment with a healthy and whole me. I have confidence that you can do this too.
Lesley West is a teacher and a student at The School of Metaphysics (SOM) in Dallas, Texas. Lesley is passionate about permanent healing Lesley started at the SOM in 2009 she remains diligent about learning more about herself and has a strong desire to aide others. For more information on the School of Metaphysics and location visit www.som.org and if you want to know more about dreams visit Dreamschool.org. Nurse and massage therapist by trade.
